24-7 Pure Awesomeness...

How is the weekend treating you? I hope you had a few drinks or got to hang out with some friends or family, because there isn't too many things in this life more important.

I was thinking about friends and how awesome mine are and where I'd be without them, I definitely wouldn't be having such an awesome life thats for sure.

So *raises his glass* here's to my friends, may you always get back up after falling down and continue to laugh at me after I fall right after you. I don't know what I would do without you and I hope to always have the encouraging words to take those last 3 shots sitting on the bar to make the girl sitting across the other side look better. (no really thanks) I appreciate all the food we have consumed after drinking the entire day in an attempt to out drink each other... always a great idea.. and then thanks for throwing me in the shower when you think I am 'too' intoxicated to make it the extra 3 feet to the toilet.

I will never forget everything you've done for me or the places you have been with me.

*puts glass down*

Now in all seriousness, you really are awesome. Make sure to let those people around you know that from time to time, it's good to let the people that help you through life know how much they mean to you.

Just a friendly note, now go back to having an awesome weekend! Caio!

Posted in: happiness, little things, thanks on Saturday, February 28, 2009 at at 2:58 PM 3 comments    

Seriously.. I was chilling around being awesome (if you know me laugh) and I was thinking about all the crazy slogans companies have and seemingly put millions of marketing dollars into. It's like the more meaningless and utterly vague it is the better it gets. Here let me make a quick list of these beauties..

..then you be the judge if they are stupid or not?

United Airlines, "Rising" (used to be an old slogan of theirs) Really?? You couldn't think of a better slogan than that, I mean I guess it's better than "Falling" right? This slogan makes me think wtf is rising anyways... hmm, maybe they have hot stewardesses, that would create a rise.

H&R Block, "You got people", I got people? What do you mean I got people, I mean this company is supposed to be good at accuracy right, so this slogan is a bit misleading because I have no idea who these people are? How old are they? Are they kids, do I have to take care of them? Well at least I 'got' something...

Nike, "Just do it" this slogan is great! I mean I have no idea what I am doing nor do the people that thought it up, but it sounds cool. And it makes me want to do it.. whatever 'it' is.. I actually like this one because it makes you think...

McDonald's, "We love to see you smile" Well dude, if that's all you want then I guess I will just walk into a local McDonald's and smile at the cashier while I twittle my thumbs, then walk out. Glad I made your day.. Or how about their new one "I'm Loving It", what are you loving exactly? The fact that your food makes me vomit after eating it and only on really drunk occasions I actually stumble in there? Or it could be the diarrhea it hits you with..

"Obey your thirst", .. or what I might get dehydrated and pass out? This slogan doesn't really make me want to buy their product. It's not like I have conversations with my thirst and I actually have to listen to it, in fact sometimes I actually do 'obey' my thirst too well, especially in those drunken years known as college... (Think of a better one Sprite)

And to finish this completely random rant, I leave you with this one:

Captain Morgen, "Got a little captain in you? Drink Responsibly" Duuuuude, seriously! If I am taking orders from a cartoon character telling me to drink responsibly, I must be already in a drunken stupor. And their ads with people walking around like a lost puppy looking like they are going to pee on a fire hydrant are stupid at best... Well at least they kept my attention long enough to not turn the channel...

And just because we are talking about advertising, in lieu of the crisis, we should change some of these corporate companies logos. So I looked around the Internet and found these... Enjoy your awesome Friday!

Posted in: advertisement, joke on Friday, February 27, 2009 at at 4:45 PM 3 comments    

..I mean why not? I know this saying is cliche, and marketed the shjt out of by Nike already, but it has such a powerful meaning behind it. If you want, you can even play with the words a bit and change it if you don't like Nike's way, like "challenge the limits" which was coined by a Swiss oil company I worked for..

Either way there really isn't a slogan like it that has so much meaning and can be related to so many things, in so few words...

[We need to just do it and I'll tell you why in a minute.]

...So I am currently going for total world domination right now (takes awhile) so while that is marinating I am learning a few other "hard things" first. Like I am currently starting to run a lot to build up stamina to compete in a marathon, which is something I have never done before. Ok ok.. compete sounds a bit hard, like I think I could actually win or something, because that's actually not the point. I am realistically just hoping to fall over the finish line after 26 some odd miles (42 km) without collapsing from utter exhaustion before that. You might be laughing but give me a break I am kinda a fat kid at heart.

And doing this training is hard, like trying to beat Zelda on original Nintendo hard, or trying to get Dominoes pizza to deliver at 4.30am in the morning because you all of a sudden need food for your drinking team.

Personally I like challenges, like trying to drink 'Extra Strength Nyquil' before reading a book in bed... (try this, I bet you don't get past page 1) or trying to pass Calculus 4 in college, that's not even hard but impossible..

A lot of people take the easy road, because the fear of falling down is so overwhelming to them that they never challenge the limits or push themselves outside of their comfort zones. You can't be afraid of falling down, I mean it's better to have fallen down then to never have fallen at all...right?

Put it like this, Life is a contact sport not a spectator sport. So there will be times where you disagree with the ref, there will be times when you need to work together to achieve a goal. You will have your fair share of wins and losses, but at the end of the day you're still having fun and you do it for the love of the game. So go out and love the game.

I mean it's impossible to reach your potential if you never challenge yourself..

And you know what, it gets better the more you challenge yourself. The power of your mind and the drive that you have is enough to propel you through anything. I mean after you complete something that's hard, you try something that's even harder after that... and the rewards keep getting bigger and better the harder something is. (It's like training for a marathon, I keep building up my tolerance and eventually I reach my goal, complete Awesomeness!)

So go out and challenge your limits, think of something right now that you think is unachievable. Then just do it, and come back here and proclaim how awesome you are!

I am waiting..

Posted in: awesomeness, challenge, impossible, potential on at at 2:43 PM 5 comments    

I know that this has been said many times and yeah I will agree when I am throwing back a cold beer with my buddies, but to be honest I don't think that having a penis makes you a better driver...

Although I do think (this is all my personal opinion of course) that men have a better sense of 'general' direction most of the time, but the counter point to that is that women do quite well with a map in hand... usually. (I say usually, because I have 3 younger sisters and there has been many times that they were a no-show at an event because they couldn't find the place.. It's always funny to get a phone call from them asking if I have ever heard of "boondock street" really?? 'nuff said)

So anyways, I happened to stumble across a hilarious clip in which it shows how great female drivers are. (Ok in only half of them women stepped out of the car, but I will trust the maker of the clip compilation that all were women.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rHY1qKLLws&eurl=http://hfboards.com/showthread.php?t=611306

Just a nice Friday morning laugh for you.. Trying to bring you awesomeness 24-7! Enjoy...

Posted in: cars, drivers, men, women on at at 10:36 AM 3 comments    

If you want to see retarded engineering at it's finest, you have to check out the new pomegranate phone. Umm yeah you heard me right, that little red fruit that looks funny and tastes weird.. well now they named a phone after it.

This phone is 50% retarded, 75% ugly and 100% useless. Let me explain my haste judgement and rash thinking.

This phone can do the following:
-Shave your face
-Make coffee (yeah a fakking coffee making phone)
-Harmonica (because we know you so desperately need one)
-Voice translator (huh, really?)

Just to name a few of it's functions. So I guess you can say it's unique, but I am still not sure if it can even make phone calls? (although they are claiming it can) As well as Internet and all the other modern day functions we are getting used too.

Move over I-phone and make room for your retarded, red-headed step sister. She can play music, shave your face and even make coffee for you..

The things people think up nowadays are hilarious. I don't even know what this thing costs, nor do I care, but it can't be cheap. (Maybe they give you free packs of coffee to go with it when you sign a contract?) Could be a good selling point.

Check this thing out yourself.... http://www.pomegranatephone.com/

Posted in: expensive, phone, ugly on Thursday, February 26, 2009 at at 3:27 PM 9 comments    

...Ok don't literally forget the big stuff, like valentine's day, birthdays, Christmas... (especially your moms and/or girlfriends)

But lets put those away for a moment, and think about the little things. The things that most people would say matter a heck of a lot more. Like the small kisses that are 100% unexpected, the card you made by hand for someone for no particular reason at all, the flowers you sent just because, or even that dinner you made for your siblings, even if they could barely eat it.. (it's the thought that counts, in fact, I once made mac & cheese for my sisters and it turned into cheesy noodle soup because of the excessive amount of milk I used..)

*bad cooking memories* haha

Or even like the picture suggests, a small handshake to show you respect and appreciate someone else, because sometimes these gestures speak much louder than words.

Either way take time out to do these 'little nothings' more, you will feel great afterwards and believe me the person will appreciate it to no end, keep passing the awesomeness around.

Posted in: little things, memories, moments on at at 8:30 AM 0 comments    

I want to share with you my never ending love/hate relationship.. and that special someone is called "the internet".

She is the only one that can make me love her and absolutely hate her at the same time, there is times I literally feel like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde at the same moment. I actually want to throw the the computer out the window because it can't get a good connection and then 20 minutes later I am back digging in the bushes trying to proclaim how sorry I am... (don't picture that, haha)

She is like a drug to be honest, the most addicting one ever. I mean if you thought pot or beer was addicting at times, then obviously you have never been stuck without your internet for longer than a day or 2. Seriously try it, I bet you will realize how much you need her. (or him for the girl readers)

I love the speed somedays and I how well I can navigate from page to page with ease, then other days I can't even look at the weather page and it just so happened to be the day that I left my jacket and gloves at home as I was out for a jog, yeah shitty... Gotta love when she plays a trick like that on you.

I can literally find everything and anything through her, she can tell me my aunt's long lost cousin who's father was a convict... what?!? We are related... thanks alot for letting me know. I mean the possibilities are endless, especially with that these 'speed of light' search engines, I mean really who brings back results like these? 1,660,000,000 for the word love in the super slow speed of (0.16 seconds). Really? wrap your mind around that..

The internet is great, little guys who have small.. err umm packages, (for the lack of a better word) can hide behind the screen in their cubicles at work or at home and act like they have the biggest "you know what" of them all. Unreal, you don't even know how many times I would have loved to have met that 10 year old boy typing words like "pee-pee head" at me through the internet.

The internet can be too personal as well, I mean now everytime I hear someone say, "you got a myspace page" I think to myself 'must be a pedophile.' I know that is sterotyping but I am just saying...

I mean I can connect to anyone at anytime, anywhere. Thats sick. But at the same time I have friends all over the world which can only be described by one word "AWESOME!"

One last thing I wonder about is the fact that it isn't personal enough at times, where are the humans? I think this is taken for granted at how nice it is to talk to a normal human. (Believe me I love the affair I have with the internet) But sometimes it's too much.

Either way, I don't know if I will ever stop my love/hate relationship with the internet, I just hope my wife doesn't mind.. haha!

Posted in: computer, hate, internet, love, relationship on Wednesday, February 25, 2009 at at 11:44 PM 7 comments    

Newspapers, internet blogs, television news, the list goes on. How do you choose which one to read or what internet site to frequent?

There is so many to choose from? And the biases of most are blatantly obvious. Do you choose to go with the most neutral one or the one that is the most local? Or maybe you are one that only believes religiously in the wall street journal or possibly maybe only one particular columnist and read nothing but his/her articles.

I personally have a friend thats obsessed with Ann Coultier and her extreme conservative views, so I can see how that happens.

And on the other side I have people I can think of right now that I believe absolutely know NOTHING about anything and I avoid their articles like the plague. Either way, what media is the right media and how do you choose?

I personally choose whoever is the most awesome and positive person... I am not into the negative side of things or life for that matter. Just pure awesomeness! Seek it out and find it wherever you can...

Posted in: media, newspaper, radio, television on at at 10:05 AM 1 comments    

Talk about the worst service you could possible get, service as in getting me to my destination at the time I am supposed to get there. I mean I am lucky to even be there in the same day let alone have my luggage make it, which it didn't. No worries though I have lost my luggage at the airport, err umm correction, the airline(s) (trying to not place blame on only Continental but they are the most recent to screw up and probably the worst so far) have lost my luggage for the 3rd or 4th time in the last year.

Not to mention I got re-routed 3 times just to make it back home, and the whole all out olympic style sprint across the London-Heathow airport is always my idea of a good time. Can you say 'sweaty as a son-of-a-bitch' wow.. The lady was like "no need to run you have time..." and no more then 5 seconds after she said that, the door closed behind me.... haha, yeah right lady plenty of time.

I can't blame everything on Continental though, I mean some of the blame has to go to the Newark airport which could be the worst and slowest airport I have ever seen.. I mean there is not one single frickin clock in that entire building, not one?? And it seems as though people there are accustomed to everything running as fast as molasses in the winter in MN. And I say that because everyone was so happy, I couldn't believe how nice they were for being such a crappy airport as far as timeliness goes. BTW, he whole 'pull me off to the side and feel my up and down while looking for something illegal is great' I think that happens to me every other time I fly, does anyone else have this kind of luck?

Lesson learned, pay the extra $100-200 dollars and get on with someone who is reliable.

Posted in: airlines, airports, friends, late, traveling on at at 8:13 AM 1 comments